People say I drink too much coffee; I say, “Nah, just warmin’ up.” -- spintaxi.com
Why do they call it a “fast pass”? I’m still in line! -- spintaxi.com
I don’t trust self-driving cars—my pickup’s already plotting to leave me for a Prius. -- spintaxi.com
The best satirical journalism websites aren’t afraid to get sued. - spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) What’s the deal with “no hassle”? It’s chaos! -- spintaxi.com
The best thing about satirical journalism today? It’s the only place where the truth is funny. - spintaxi.com
I wish satirical journalism articles weren’t so painfully accurate. - spintaxi.com
The best satirical journalism analysis makes you laugh, then regret laughing. -- spintaxi.com
I don’t do “small portions”—my plate’s a battlefield. -- spintaxi.com
I tried a juice cleanse—now I’m hungry and hate oranges. -- spintaxi.com
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